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26 Things the movies taught us

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  • 26 Things the movies taught us

    26 Things the Movies Taught You

    1. Large, loft-style apartments in New York City are well within the

    price range of most people - whether they are employed or not.



    2. At least one of a pair of identical twins is born evil.



    3. Should you decide to defuse a bomb, don't worry which wire to cut.

    You will always choose the right one.



    4. Most laptop computers are powerful enough to override the

    communications system of any invading alien society.



    5. It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involving

    martial arts; your enemies will wait patiently to attack you one by one

    dancing around in a threatening manner until you have knocked out

    their predecessors.



    6. When you turn out the light to go to bed, everything in your bedroom

    will still be clearly visible, just slightly bluish.



    7. If you are a blonde and pretty, it is possible to become a world

    expert on nuclear fission at the age of 22.



    8. Honest and hardworking policemen are traditionally gunned down three

    days before their retirement.



    9. Rather than wasting bullets, megalomaniacs prefer to kill their

    archenemies using complicated machinery involving fuses, pulley systems,

    deadly gasses, lasers, and man eating sharks, which will allow their

    captives at least 20 minutes to escape.



    10. All beds have special L-shaped cover sheets that reach the armpit

    level on a woman, but only to the waist level on the man lying beside her.



    11. All grocery shopping bags contain at least one stick of French bread.



    12. It's easy for anyone to land a plane, provided there is someone in the

    control tower to talk you down.



    13. Once applied, lipstick will never rub off - even while scuba diving.



    14. You're very likely to survive any battle in any war unless you make

    the mistake of showing someone a picture of your sweetheart back home.



    15. Should you wish to pass yourself off as a German or Russian officer,

    it will not be necessary to speak the language. A German or Russian accent

    will do.



    16. The Eiffel Tower can be seen from any window in Paris.



    17. A man will show no pain while taking the most ferocious beating, but

    will wince when a woman tries to clean his wounds.



    18. If a large pane of glass is visible, someone will be thrown through

    it before long.



    19. If staying in a haunted house, women should investigate any

    strange noise in their most revealing underwear.



    20. Word processors never display a cursor on the screen but will always

    say: "Enter password now."



    21. Even when driving down a perfectly straight road, it is necessary to

    turn the steering wheel vigorously from left to right every few moments.



    22. All bombs are fitted with electronic timing devices with large red

    readout's so you know exactly when they're going to go off.



    23. A detective can only solve a case once he has been suspended from duty.



    24. If you decide to start dancing in the street, everyone you meet will

    know all the steps.



    25. Police departments give their officers personality tests to make sure

    they are deliberately assigned a partner who is the total opposite.

    26. When they are alone, all foreign military officers prefer to speak to

    each other in English.





    THOUGHT FOR THE DAY:

    When NASA first started sending up astronauts, they quickly discovered

    that ballpoint pens would not work in 0 gravity. To combat this problem,

    NASA scientists spent a decade and $12 billion developing a pen that writes

    in zero gravity, upside down, underwater, on almost any surface including

    glass and at temperatures ranging from below freezing to over 300 C.

    The Russians used a pencil.





    >--------------------------------------------------------------
    "Almost anything you do will seem insignificant, but it is very important that you do it. You must be the change that you wish to see in the world." Gandhi

  • #2
    hehe thanks for that Misty!



    it made me smile :lol:

    Comment


    • #3
      LOL! :lol:



      20. Word processors never display a cursor on the screen but will always

      say: "Enter password now."


      Have you noticed, they always rapidly type and clatter around on the keyboard too as the screen flashes about rapidly? Never use a mouse either! :lol:

      Comment


      • #4
        :hihi: :hihi: :hihi:



        Misty, you've summed out just about everything I know.

        Comment


        • #5
          Spot on Misty :hihi: :lol: :P



          Brilliant, and gave me a good laugh on this nasty, dark, windy evening :lol: :lol: :hihi:



          Sapph :thumbs:

          Comment


          • #6
            Originally posted by Mistyeyeddreamer@Oct 9 2003, 9:02 PM

            The Russians used a pencil.
            :lol: :hihi: :lol: Excellent!

            Comment


            • #7
              I have trying to think about other things movies teach us................................................ .........................................



              ..............................................



              ........................................I think you about covered it! :lol:

              Comment


              • #8
                Haraharrahrr



                I like it :thumbs:



                What about that the arch enemy usually has an English accent (in the USA).



                And you don't need to be weighed down with heavy ammunition if you are marauding about shooting everyone - your gun will self load as if by magic.



                And finally, (OK, this is TV really) In Australian programmes, 'the idiot', 'eccentric' & 'interfering' old bat has always got a British accent too! :blink:

                Comment


                • #9
                  If there is an old derelict house on a lonely moor with a haunted look about it, it will only ever be entered late a night, in stormy weather, with lightening flashing, by a young woman who then walks slowly around the house without putting the light on

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Also no matter how scary things get, no-one ever uses the loo. :blink:

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      and what about when they have nookie!



                      no sweat just nice music and then they dont even clean up after wards!! :lol: :lol:



                      and the make up doesnt smudge and the hair stays the same

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Euurrrgh, Beth, yuk!!! :hihi:

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Too much information! :P :blink:

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            and then they dont even clean up after wards!!


                            Beth, I'm assuming you didn't mean the dusting!! 8-X

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              :lol:



                              This is a good thread!!! ha ha, I like it!



                              what about when people enter into a very dark and creepy house, they NEVER put the the light on, thus allowing the baddie to leap out and scare the whatsits out of everyone!



                              :hihi: :blink:
                              http://bestsmileys.com/sparkle/1.gif



                              I decree today that life

                              Is simply taking and not giving

                              England is mine - it owes me a living

                              But ask me why, and I'll spit in your eye

                              Oh, ask me why, and I'll spit in your eye ~ Morrisey/Marr




                              Politics is Showbusiness for ugly people ~ Jay Leno



                              I don't like liars, I don't like cheats. I don't like bullsh***ters. I don't like schmoozers. I don't like ar*e-lickers. ~ Sir Alan Sugar



                              "Why, Sir, you find no man, at all intellectual, who is willing to leave London. No, Sir, when a man is tired of London, he is tired of life; for there is in London all that life can afford." ~ Samuel Johnson



                              The secret of success is the capacity to overcome failure ~ Noel Coward



                              An economist is an expert who will know tomorrow why the things he predicted yesterday didn’t happen today ~ Laurence J. Peter



                              Always laugh when you can. It is cheap medicine ~ Lord Byron



                              Better bread with water than cake with trouble ~ Russian Proverb



                              There is no trouble so great or grave that cannot be much diminished by a cup of tea ~ Bernard-Paul Heroux



                              Carpe Diem



                              Give Yourself to It ~ Sue Gadenne

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