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  • loud music, tv, banging doors

    hi, this is my first post. It's a similar tale to the ones already posted. 2 students have moved in next door, they play loud music and loud telly during the day, but the worst thing is that they slam doors all hours of the day (the record being 02:30).

    I made the mistake of banging on the walls when the music started, then later hammering on the door when the music started up. I was met by an arrogant s*d of about 20, who told me it was his house and shook his head when i asked him to keep it down. I got really angry and told him there would be trouble if he didnt keep it down, to which he replied "is that a threat?"

    The problem is that i am ill and the stress of it all has made my illness much worse. Im very down at the moment. dont know what to do.

    grateful for any help, advice



    thanks

  • #2
    Hi fiddler



    its horrible having to live with someone elses noise, the worse thing to me apart from the chinese water torture effect, is the fact we have no control over the noise.

    we can not turn it down or turn the channel over, and I am sorry if I am being stereo typed, but it seems that all my nfh have had dreadful taste in music!!



    boom boom boom



    you need to be very cool with your NFH and dont get into conversation,



    you could try once more asking them to be considerate an dthen I would write to them,



    are they tenents? or owners, it seems a lot of students are renters.



    if renting find out who the landlord is and have a chat with him/her,

    many landlords have clauses in the contracts



    logg all noise and times/dates.

    there is a form on the main site under resources it is taken from the form we used our selfs with our NFH



    then if still no joy contact EHO team.



    well thats a start!

    try these things and let us know a bit more



    remember your health is important, dont let them make you ill, or a victim.



    please go and see your GP



    good luck

    Comment


    • #3
      Welcome, fiddler.



      The elements of your topic header are familiar. Our NFH's act 'holier than thou' and 'a law unto themselves' with regards the noise they make.



      In my case (see Private Tenants from Hell) if one took to the same reaction as they do to to our dog's barking they'd soon come back with a tirade of abuse- exposing themselves as the ultimate hypocrites.



      For the record, my wife and I swapped to another bedroom, but have not given our NFH's the satisfaction of knowing that.



      I send my sympathies to one equally searching for common sense advice.
      I'm playing all the right notes, but necessarily in the right order.

      Comment


      • #4
        Hi fiddler and welcome to the Forum



        Sorry to hear about the problems with your neighbour from hell (NFH). Noise is awful to suffer from, like Beth says, you have no control over it: you don't know when it's going to stop or start, go louder or quieter. It can affect your sleep, ability to function properly at work and basically be just yourself.



        Like Badger says, try not to get into any sort of argument with your nfh. By all means go round and explain your concerns about the level of noise - even better, put something in writing (and always keep a copy). (In my situation, I spoke to my nfh (neighbour from hell) about five times and wrote twice).



        - You must start to jot down any and all instances of noise (make sure you supply all relevant information - follow the sheet in the resources section that Beth has already directed you to).



        - Noise is a "statutory nuisance". The owner/occupier of the property is the person who will be held responsible in terms of action from the Environmental Health (EH) department. The owner cannot therefore say, "It's not me, it's someone else". Noise late at night (between 11 pm - 7am) may be more of a nuisance.



        - Contact the EH if the neighbour doesn't respond to your complaint. You will need to provide them with some personal details. When they contact your nfh, they will say that they have had a complaint - they will not name you (or they shouldn't), although your nfh may have a good idea where the complaint has come from.



        - You could contact mediation.



        - You could fight fire with fire (my personal view is that T*t for tat behaviour is likely to make the situation worse and will not help you if you need to progress your case further with the EH).



        - The EH process is a fairly lengthy one, we can give you further informaiton on this if you want it - although each EH/ local authority (LA) may have slightly different procedures).



        So, just to sum up, your next steps are:



        * Write to your nfh

        * Start recording on the sheet all the incidents of noise (music, telly, banging doors, shouting etc.)



        Good luck with whatever you decide and remember, we're all here whenever you want to talk to someone about it.



        Just to get a clearer, bigger picture, it will help if you can tell us whether you own your home or rent (privately, from a Council or Housing Association) and what the situation is with your nfh.



        Good luck, keep us informed.

        Comment


        • #5
          Hi Fiddler and welcome to the board.



          B*****y students!!! (Not you Matthew ). They're out of sight of their parents and they seem to go bonkers! Other members have given you some excellent advice so all I can do is sympathise Until about a month ago I had no problems with next door neighbours, but sadly that has all changed so I have a feeling of what you are going through



          I hope you can get some action from the landlord and/or the EHO. Good luck



          Misty
          "Almost anything you do will seem insignificant, but it is very important that you do it. You must be the change that you wish to see in the world." Gandhi

          Comment


          • #6
            hat a arrogant attitude, its his house and he can do what he wants, God help us if he goes through life with this attitude.call the police if he makes noises during the night with his music, if it was a pub they would be up in court.

            Comment


            • #7
              thanks for the replies! very much appreciated! Nice to know im not alone.

              They must have banged the doors about 20 times today! Its got to the point where i am just waiting for the next bang! Then the music started....

              Im actually a student myself, but with the OU, so trying to get some work done is impossible at the moment.

              I'll keep you posted, thanks again for the support!

              Comment


              • #8
                good morning fiddler,

                /me has the same problem with a student house....have you considered hiring a hitman? ... i know it might be expensive but i think you can apply for aid from http://www.enoughofignorantoiks.co.u...cttheirslifes! it may seem extreme but worth considering.

                i tried the banging on wall/shouting/turning own music up approach with a different past prollem...it succeeded in getting them to make more noise...so i ended up running round and banging on the door in a temper...hard to stay cool aintant it.

                Little in-ear ear plugs with ear defenders over the top can make it a tad quieter...maybe you could brake into the house and steal all their doors?

                i reckon the advice from others seems pretty good too though..i think the quiet ice cool talking to them thing is the best approach..i don't think its good to make it sound like you are "telling" them to stop, human nature not to be told what to do and all that. Maybe the "do you not care about other ppl and how you effect them, and "do i not have the equal rites to quietness in my house?"...flat out asking "do you deliberately want to cause me problems, what have i done to you to deserve this?" ... ok it might werk....of course ppl who could think wouldn't do it in the first place...maybe it'll a least give them food for thought for the future....the jurys still out on my situation...maybe other ppl have tried these approaches and can say how they turned out...( specially the hitman one).

                Good Luck!

                Comment


                • #9
                  Originally posted by fiddler@May 24 2003, 12:08 AM

                  They must have banged the doors about 20 times today! Its got to the point where i am just waiting for the next bang! Then the music started....
                  Make sure you start writing everything down - get on the the EH department - Good luck!

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    They must have banged the doors about 20 times today! Its got to the point where i am just waiting for the next bang[/b]


                    Grrrr, that's the thing, once you've got trouble like this you can never relax. The peaceful times are spoiled by the expectation of it starting up again I'd never really had problems with next door neighbours until a month ago and Fridaynight/Saturday morning was hell. Every time I thought they'd stopped (thundering upstairs, slamming doors) they'd start again! Aaaarrrgggghhhh!



                    As the other members have said, log each and every incident. If you find it a pain writing it down when it happens (especially at night), get yourself a little dictaphone and keep it next to the bed.



                    Good luck



                    Misty
                    "Almost anything you do will seem insignificant, but it is very important that you do it. You must be the change that you wish to see in the world." Gandhi

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      I've thought about a hitman, but more worryingly i have been very near to taking a knife next door and ending the noise once and for all!

                      Im completely obsessed by this now, it is ruling my life and i need to get away from here as soon as possible.

                      I cant bring myself to note down everytime the doors bang, music starts, etc, because i think im going round the bend as it is! If i started doing that i think i may as well sign myself up for the asylum now.

                      Something has to happen here soon, i cannot and will not put up with it any longer.

                      Isnt it terrible that i would be happy to see them burn to death?

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        by the way, your eyes arent deceiving you, i am posting at 03:30! I cant sleep these days. I'll be woken up tomorrow though!

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Originally posted by fiddler@May 30 2003, 3:25 AM

                          I've thought about a hitman, but more worryingly i have been very near to taking a knife next door and ending the noise once and for all!
                          NO NO NO!



                          We have all felt that way fiddler, honest we have (theres a poll proving it!!)



                          just remember you are not them, you will not lower yourself to their level!



                          you are a strong powerful person who in time will make big changes to your life!



                          you will stop the noise but in a legal and just way.

                          wrtite it all down and get in touch with the EHO!.....have you done that yet?



                          I know how horrible sleep deprivation is, I do shifts and not being able to get decent sleep did my head in, I used to cry all the time as I was just so tired.

                          is there any way you can sleep in another room for a night? or at a friends, just to get that one nights sleep you need?



                          you say you cant bring your self to keep writing it down...



                          please please try to ....I know it feels obsessive but this is important evidence against them and this is how you are going to make your life changes.



                          one tip for you, write stuff on a scrap of paper when it happens and then later when you feel you can face it put it on the form.



                          it is also a little bit of thearapy, when you write down how it made you feel, self counselling almost!



                          keep being strong and come and rant at us when you need to.

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Ditto everything that Beth has said.



                            You will have days and nights like this fiddler, it is awful and can really put your health (physical and emotional) under great strain.



                            By all means have your fantasies about what you would like to do, but never take the law into your own hands on this type of issue. It will only make the situation so much worse for you.



                            You really must start jotting everything down - I know it is a drag, but it just has to be done.



                            Try to get yourself out from the house doing things you enjoy, try using earplugs at night as they do block out some of the noise. If you feel like your mind is just full of NFH and that their behaviour has just taken over everything in your life (including your thoughts), then please go and see your GP to have a chat.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Fiddler, my sympathy for you has increased a hundredfold since my last posting. My new neighbours are driving me insane with exactly the same things that yours are to you



                              But I have to strongly urge you to listen to what Beth and Holly have said. It's a normal human reaction to want to STOP THE NOISE, and we all really do understand because we've been there. And I'm sure we've all fantasized about what we'd like to do to the **********s.



                              I've always found that logging incidents is almost as stressful as the incidents themselves but you really have to do it so you have something to show to the EHO, council, landlord or whoever might help you.



                              I hope I'm making sense because my sleep pattern has gone to hell since NFH moved in. I'm not getting to sleep much before 5am - not because they're making noise til then, they usually finish around 2.30am but I'm too wound up to get straight to sleep. I think you are probably the same.



                              Please don't give up on the legal routes to getting these ignorant no-marks to stop.



                              Misty
                              "Almost anything you do will seem insignificant, but it is very important that you do it. You must be the change that you wish to see in the world." Gandhi

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