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    Hi all,

    It's been a while since I submitted my story to the board. I had written a letter to the council and cc'd it to the police way back in December. Since then the council have actually had words with my neighbour but the police have not bothered even though they said they now work side-by-side with local authorities. I have called the police three times and left messages for the community officer to no avail. The council say they are also having difficulty contacting the police.

    I eventually received a letter from the council after I asked for the outcome of the meetings to be sent to me in writing. I was told that they could not divulge this information as it was confidential! Hello? didn't it involve me?! However, the letter did say that as far as the council were concerned the matter had been resolved (this being the case of the slabs on my drive being removed).

    I felt semi-jubilant when I realised that I might be able to use this letter as "proof" that my dispute had been resolved. I reasoned that she would probably be on her best behaviour with someone new. No sooner did this cross my mind then my nfh resumed hammering at all hours of the night. I had to telephone the council again when one day, a couple of weeks ago, I went into work feeling physically sick because she had been hammering on and off since 3am that morning.

    Last Saturday, the nfh confronted me and said that the council had been to see her about the hammering and as there was no sign of any D.I.Y. it couldn't possibly be her! She also said that kids were responsible for the hammering because there was graffiti and cigarette butts round the back of our block. She said that they had bothered her so much that she had to sleep in her front room. I could not believe that she lied to me so blatantly! She later retracted that the "kids" bothered her and said she never reported them as she didn't want to get anyone into trouble. She also said that I had no proof that it was her and that I should behave like a normal person when she did make noise by having the decency to go downstairs to ask her to turn the noise down rather than reporting her!!

    She said that she had told the council that I was neurotic and had a vendetta against her. She said she also complained about my using a power shower at 6am every morning! Reality: I can't remember the last time I got up at 6am and I don't even have a shower! When mentioned, she said she would welcome sound recording equipment in her flat and would want to have me recorded too.

    She insisted that I had made a lot of noise the week before when a man (the only man who comes to see me) with a babyseat in the car, visited me and we watched the war. Reality: My friend Sandra came to see me two weeks previously in her husband's 2-seater MG (therefore no babyseat .. it's in her other car) and we watched Harry Potter for 3 hours to take her mind off the fact that her baby is seriously ill. My TV was on slightly higher than usual ... Vol. 20 (it's normally anywhere between 12-18 depending on the noise from my nfh), in order to drown out the nfh's TV, but not excessively so.

    She got quite irate and stood about 4 inches away from my face, jabbing her index fingers either side of my eyes for some time. She really did try and intimidate me but I stood my ground. Eventually she started up with her usual verbal insults about my appearance.

    It was quite weird really because even though I had been shaking and could feel my adrenaline pumping before I went outside, because I knew she was waiting for me, I actually felt a lot better once I'd run the gauntlet. The fact that she made herself look and sound so pathetic really made me feel a lot more upbeat about things.

    I am still thinking of moving because I cannot be bothered to deal with her craziness anymore. It has been a lot quieter in the last week and I just hope that it remains that way for the forseeable future.

    So now I am going to be brave, do a huge spring clean and put my property on the market to see if I get a bite!

    Hope you all have a wonderful Easter.


  • #2
    Hi Becca, your NFH sounds seriously deranged. Does she live in some sort of alterntive reality? Sounds like, the way she makes up stories and claims them as fact!!

    Good luck with the sale of your property, hope you find a buyer soon. If the local chapter of the hells angels come to view I'd sell it to them, see how you NFH likes that

    "Almost anything you do will seem insignificant, but it is very important that you do it. You must be the change that you wish to see in the world." Gandhi


    • #3
      Hi Becca

      I have just read your initial posting (back in January, I don't know how I missed it then) and what you have been through is horrible. Like Misty says, this woman seems to have a very warped sense of reality.

      I would feel livid at her remarks. They just have to try and make themselves feel better don't they? T*t for tat/ playground games...pathetic

      I know the sickening feelings that I had when I spoke to our (current) nfh, I had to pluck up the courage to face him the first time, but it did get easier.

      Your LA seem to be a waste of space, they were dealing with this complaint at your instigation so why couldn't they send you information - even if they did blank out certain 3rd party bits of information. I would never hold out great hope in proactive behaviour by the Police (they took 84 hours to respond to my 999 call).

      It sounds from your update that you have made your mind up about moving and hopefully that will now give you something positive to work towards. Watch "Selling Houses" (Channel 4?) which is a newish programme and quite honest with prospective sellers.

      Keep us updated Becca. By the way, has your nfh stopped using your parking area now?

      Good luck


      • #4
        Good grief Becca, your NFH is something else, not only is she blatantly attempting to cause you problems with false allegations with the council, she seems to be a very deceptive and manipulative person!

        Good for you, for asking for a response, you are entitled to one. It's ironic isn't it, all you seem to hear is how the NFH's right's will be affected and their confidentiality and human rights, the sufferers tend (or certainly seem to be!) to be forgotten sometimes. Still, I understand the Local Authority staff have to cover themselves, but sometimes I think a bit more compassion wouldn't go amiss for the actual victim.

        I know the Police community officers are often extremely busy and under-resourced, but honestly to still get no reply.........well it's just bad isn't it? Hopeless!

        Good luck with selling - have a nice Easter too and hopefully a peaceful one


        • #5
          hey Becca!

          typical NFH trying to make you look bad, they all do it!

          "wasnt us but you should of heard the noise she was making!!"

          silly woman!

          the finger wagging is not good for either of you, you need to insist that the community officer or someone comes out to see you, that is threatening behaviour.

          you need to tell the police that you feel at risk because of this womans actions and that you may have to ring in an emergancy if she has a go at you.

          write to them and demand you see someone!

          stay safe!


          • #6
            Hi everyone,

            Thanks again for your responses and your words of encouragement!

            The majority of people I speak with tend to think my nfh is totally mad even though, lucky for them, most have not had to go through such an experience. However, the odd one or two seem to think it is reasonable to do "D.I.Y." at 3:00am which I find absolutely shocking! Thank goodness I don't live anywhere near them!

            I think all the drugs my nfh has taken over the years has taken a toll on her brain-function, which would explain a lot and probably does mean that she lives in a warped alternative reality. Funny how she's always telling me to get down from my tower (she think I think I am better than everyone else) and join the real world. I've come to the conclusion that she is envious because I am younger, have a job and own my property, which is quite sad really.

            I think it would definitely be better for me in the long run if I did move even though it would mean taking on a larger mortgage, it would be worth it just for the peace of mind. I'm sure I will wonder why I didn't do it sooner. I really do hope that my nfh behaves herself with anyone who buys my place as she has absolutely no reason (beyond her own madness) to be nasty to someone new. I also hope I sell to a man because I don't think she would dare try her tactics then.

            In response to Hollygolightly .... Yes, I watch all the "house" programmes!!! I am obsessed! I envy the people on these programmes as I feel like a trapped bird at the moment, but they do give me hope. I've given up on the council and the police but feel stronger in myself and know I can do this. My nfh has stopped blatantly parking on my drive or blocking it but still uses it in order to line her car up to the car she doesn't use.

            I know she will think that she has "won" and driven me out but I don't care what she thinks because I will know that I have gained a house with my own garden and, hopefully, lovely new neighbours!



            • #7
              Originally posted by Becca@Apr 15 2003, 11:58 AM

              I know she will think that she has "won" and driven me out but I don't care what she thinks
              Correct! What you choose to do has nothing to do with her.

              You were probably never going to spend the rest of your life at this property and so when you choose move is irrelevant. She may just be the impetus to gee-up your "life plan" but so what?

              It's watching all those house programmes isn't it?! That's why you want to move .

              Just think, you can view loads of houses and have a good look inside other people's homes!

              I am in a good mood today, but I don't want to seem like I am trivialising your nfh problems because I'm not. But you have to look on this as a positive.

              You will move and you will find somewhere lovely. Leave this woman behind in her own little warped world were she belongs.


              • #8
                good luck dear, i know how things must be to make you want to move, these people try to make you feel inferior and no worthy but thats just a reflection of their own fears and c*** lives.

                im glad to see that you sound stronger, thats the only way to get by, try to ignore all the petty comments and behaviour.

                good luck for the future