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  • Help What A Nightmare

    we have a family who stay above us.our kids went to school with there kids and they seemed to get on well,to start with.In feb this year our daughters had an argument the girls are in primary 4,i didnt know anything about this untill i got back from seeing my family.We were completly ignored and bad comments maide towards us.In about Aoril time she assaulted my husband and we got her charged for that as well as 3 breech of the peace charges on her.Since then it has built up and up.Our front door has been vandalised,spat on kicked,as well as our windows being sparyed with juice.Any rubbish in the internal close is being swept to our front door.our children cannot play to the rear of the house,i cant hang out washing as it is spat on and things thrown at it,we have to either empty our bins in the morning or late at night.We have tryed to talk to her and her husband but we are always cofronted with verbal and sometimes phsical abuse.My husband and i do not go out alone ever.She has also put lite cigarettes through the letter box which really upset me.We have 4 children and i will not put there lifes in danger like that but i will not get into a phsical fight with her i would rather walk away as it annoy her more.She spreds nasty and millicious rumours about us which is really quite hurtfull as this is the town i grew up in.The council dont seem to be interested in the least,we have phoned them ,e mailed them with no joy whatsoever.i really dont know what to do :sad: :cry: :cry: :cry:

  • #2
    Hi Silky,



    You're right it really does sound like a nightmare



    You say you've approached the council so I'm assuming you and your NFH are in council accommodation.



    Firstly, you should keep a diary of everthing that happens. Log each and every incident. You can download blank diary pages from the resource section on the main page.



    If you can, take photographs of the rubbish that is being dumped in front of your door and any other damage or vandalism.



    Call your local police station and ask to speak to the Neighbourhood officer. Tell him what has been happening and ask him for advice or help. Then call your local housing office and demand to speak to someone about what is happening. Ask them if they have any strategies in place to tackle antisocial behaviour. If you visit your local housing office take your diaries and any other evidence with you to show them.



    You are very wise not to retaliate, it will only count against you in the future.



    I'm sure other members will have a lot more sound advice for you so don't despair



    Misty
    "Almost anything you do will seem insignificant, but it is very important that you do it. You must be the change that you wish to see in the world." Gandhi

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    • #3
      she sounds like a truly nasty person :angry:



      you must record everything as Misty has said



      get on to the council and the police



      if stuff gets put through your door, stick it in a bag (try not to touch it) and give it to the police.



      take pics and get a dictaphone if you can to record the nasty things she is saying.



      let us know how it all goes.



      and stay cool, never retailaite

      Comment


      • #4
        Hi Silky



        Dreadful situation



        When you said the council have been unhelpful..is that your local housing office, and are you and nfh both local authority tenants??

        If so, then that's not a bad thing in terms of action by Housing.



        Firstly the tenancy agreement will have a clause in about nuisance and harassment, and you already have some good evidence here. You need a meeting with your local Estate Management Officer, and their Team Manager(as previous complaints have resulted in no action). Perhaps an invite to one of your local councillors(you probably have 3 to choose from, any will do!), might help everyone take notice. At least a Final Written Warning(as the behaviour-with-evidence is ) should be considered here. Your Council should also have a "Nnuisance and Hharassment" team/officer...ask the council switchboard for their number, and also get them involved



        A look at "legislation" on the left hand side of the nfh home page, and a look at the law on protection from harassment may be useful, in seeing if the police can use the law to help you from further problems.



        You are spot on not to retaliate, both in terms of your famil's safety, and in pursuing some action against nfh. Well done for restraining yourself, I'm sure at times it's not been easy!



        I'm sure you will get lots of help/advice here...good luck, and let us know how you go on





        Sapph

        Comment


        • #5
          Hi silky and welcome



          What an awful situation for you to be living in.



          In terms of the way forward, Misty, Beth and Sapphire have already given you good advice which you need to follow up.



          Are any other neighbours affected by this family or have they always just targetted you and your family? Are you able to get support from any of the other neighbours living near you?



          Please let us know how you get on.

          Comment


          • #6
            Hi Silky, I do sympathise as our NFH problem started after a neighbours kid started being spiteful to my daughter, when they previously had been friends, they were 5 at the time.!!!! it seems ridculous doesnt it, small kids have arguments all the time, and really the adults should know better and not escalate it out of proportion.



            the mother NFH just totally turned and from that day on she has been a right [email protected]*%h and has encouraged her kids to be destructive and annoying as much as possible to us. she has fallen out with other people on the road so they get the same treatment.



            but we live on a private road, so we decided to move house sooner than we would have liked because we have had enough.



            the other s have given you very good advice but you have to be persistent with the authorities, you do not have to put up with being assaulted and if your NFH live in council accomodation they need to be careful as the can be evicted if they carry on. so i think eventually you should be able to get some peace back. as the others said, dont ever retaliate as this gives the NFH so much ammunition and they are damn good at convoncing others that they are innocent and you are the ones in the wrong!!!!
            http://bestsmileys.com/sparkle/1.gif



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            Comment


            • #7
              Thank you all so much for all your advice,i just wish it hadnt all started.Me and my family are the only one's being targated,in a way am glad as no one else has to go through this.I contacted the council yet again and was told that the officer will phone me back,well we will wait and see as i have heard this all before.I also contaccted the Enviromental health and they will see what they can do for me.I am so glad i found this site many thanks to you all for your advice.i will keep you all informed of any progress made.Thanks :ban: :nfh1:

              Comment


              • #8
                She does sound like a nasty piece of work :nfh1: You have got some great advice, but I wanted to show my support here



                This woman is posting lit cigarettes PLEASE do all you can to catch her doing it because this is very serious and will be taken seriously.

                Inform the police, it's one thing having a finger printable stub but it's another catching her in the act and I would also talk to the fire service because they may be able to offer some advice.



                EVIL :angry:



                Idgy

                Comment


                • #9
                  Hi Silky



                  DO keep us posted on the response you get from the two council departments...I really think you need to meet with the housing dept though, to point out this catalogue of events, and the expectation of some action by them against these serious breaches of nfh's tenancy obligations.



                  Lots of luck



                  Sapph

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Hi Silky,

                    I grew up in Edinburgh, and I just wanted to greet another Scottish member of NFH! Usually I get homesick when I start thinking about Scotland... but I don't think I'd like to live in your house, with your neighbour, so I'll be staying on in Coventry for a while yet.



                    Schools are back soon (maybe already in Scotland?), so I'm putting my Parent Governor hat on: Have you spoken to the teachers about the situation? They can keep an eye on the kids at school, maybe put them in different classes...



                    What happened with the breach-of-the-peace charges? Dropped? Not gone to court yet? Guilty/Not Proven/Not Guilty? A court case hanging over neighbours doesn't help (ours was only a civil case, too).



                    Otherwise, I can echo the other advice you've had from other members.
                    "Poor Tom shall lead thee" (King Lear)

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Silky, all top advice from the other posters... When it comes to the council though, don't phone or e-mail or write to them, go down in person and demand to speak to a manager immediately. It's all to easy for a disinterested member of staff to fob you off when you're not physically there, they can't do that when you turn up in person.



                      Make sure you take another person with you to confirm what is said/agreed. Tell the council you will be keeping log files etc and that the police will be informed whenever it is deemed necessary. Remind the Council that they are bound by law to uphold and enforce the rules of their tenancy agreements - ask to see an example copy of one so you can point out how and where this person is breaking specific areas of the agreement.



                      If they are putting your children at risk by shoving lit cigarettes through the door then make sure you contact Social Services and ask them to investigate aswell, if they deem the children to be at risk from these people then the council should take action to move them.



                      Good luck

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