CHAPTER 19

A couple of ideas for a party…

1. Buy plenty of cheap ice pops/crisps and hand them out to neighbourhood children so that they all congregate near your gate in the hope they will get one. They will then all play by your gate and annoy your next door neighbour with noise and wrappers.

2. Provide a few basketballs to play with, they make a much better noise on the ground/window/car or door of your neighbour.

3. Encourage your teenage son to bring as many disaffected friends around to sit outside your neighbours gate. Provide a ghetto blaster and some lyrically parental explicit rap tapes and throw in some alcopops or special brew and a bit of weed – wow, won’t your neighbour enjoy that, especially after a 15 hour day.

4. For an extra special party buzz that your neighbour will enjoy, add some giggling girls. After a few hours either the girls will be shrieking at each other or the boys will be fighting over them…Voila!

Submitted by: Sally