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  • Changes when NFH are away

    I am enjoying a happy time at present as our nfh are away for three months

    until the end of March - they have a timeshare appartment abroad.

    > We live at the end of a cul-de-sac and have nfh next door and directly

    opposite - they are close friends and seem to bring out the worst in each

    other.

    > It is very interesting that when the nfh are away for this long period

    other neighbours in this road are much more friendly to us, more

    communicative and even call on us with thanks for greetings cards we put

    through their letterbox for birthdays etc.

    > When the nfh is here, those other neighbours stay clear of us, not

    interactive with us, avoid us and if we do manage to pass the time of day,

    they are quite curt. Totally different behaviour. The reason for this

    change in behaviour may be that the nfh will make their life difficult if

    she sees them communicating with neighbours she is determined to victimise,

    defame and spread the news that we are "thoroughly nasty people that

    everyone should stay away from". Why? Because we asked them very

    politely once - three years ago - please could they not keep tooting car

    horns on our shared drive or immediately outside our home as we found it

    very disturbing, made us jump on several occasions, particularly when late

    at night. I explained that I dropped a dish of chicken casserole when

    taking it out of the oven due to jumping at a sudden loud car horn right

    outside our kitchen door and also bit my tongue badly eating lunch due to a

    sudden loud car horn. They toot car horns to let each other (next door and

    opposite) know when they go out and arrive back.> One would think the nfh would apologise and stop doing it but no.

    > Whether the other neighbours actually believe all the nasty stories is

    another matter - they are obviously scared of the nfh seeing them making

    contact with us when they are here.

    Do the other nicer neighbours know that the nfh make fun of clothes we wear, or decoration of home, or pots/plants in our garden. That they stand and laugh at my husband loading up his golf clubs

    into our carboot. I cannot do gardening in my front garden if both nfh are

    at home without being intimidated. One will cross over the road and along

    the joint drive with nfh next door and say loudly as she enters their home

    "I thought I would come across luvvie, cos I was worried about you with her

    out on the drive" (meaning me!). They tell others that I have shouted,

    screamed, threatened and gone absolutely crazy. That has never ever

    happened. I am much too sensitive and quiet to have the confidence to shout

    or scream at anyone. I think the reason that reputation is spreading is to

    make other neighbours feel very sorry for them and focus in on them

    > When my husband had a heart attack last September and was being loaded

    into the emergency ambulance, they came out of their homes, stood near the

    ambulance talking and laughing about their bowls club activities even tho I

    was in tears on the drive.

    > When my husband came home after he recovered he stood on our porch steps

    watching the nfh who lives opposite reverse her car back on to our drive as

    there was a van parked on the other side of the drive - to monitor that she

    didn't reverse over our front garden plants again ... she stopped, got out

    of the car and shouted to my husband "I hope you have a another heart attack

    and die". My husband didn't reply or say anything.

    If the other neighbours knew all about the nfh awful behaviour, would they put up with the nfh dominating their lives?

    However, I shall continue to enjoy life as much as I can whilst the worst nfh are

    away abroad until end March, when other neighbours will keep away from us

    again. Their behaviour changes dramatically the moment nfh returns.

    > Anne Elizabeth

    >

  • #2
    Hello Anne-Elizabeth,



    Welcome to the board. I just cannot fathom such downright evil people who would laugh at your husband's life threatening condition!! Do they think they're clever or somehow superior? Because to me they are less than human if they cannot empathise with another's distress!! They are obviously, as with other nfh, totally selfish with no thought to how their antisocial behaviour affects others. They don't even care about the law - sounding their horns inappropriately is illegal. They must know they are pathetic morons but have to make a noise to try and get people to notice them. Sad G*TS!!! (sorry)



    I agree with Badger, perhaps you could use the time they are away to try and make some alliances with your other neighbours. The only way you can defeat a bully is to stand up to him/her and the more of you that do the less these pathetic excuses for human beings will like it. Don't think they're laughing at you because they think you are inferior, they're laughing because they know they can never be as nice as you so they have to try and disguise the fact. Let's face it if they didn't care about what you thought they wouldn't go out of their way to annoy you. They feel intimidated by you.



    Sorry, I'm rambling, but I get so angry when I hear stories such as yours. I hate bullies!! I hope you enjoy the next three months, but please try to get some allies Good luck



    Misty
    "Almost anything you do will seem insignificant, but it is very important that you do it. You must be the change that you wish to see in the world." Gandhi

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    • #3
      So glad you are having a quiet few months, make arrangements to move as soon as possible, i mean a neighbour would never stop me from talking to another neighbour, so its not a nice street really, yes people who are close to each other are very nasty, they rhink they can make comments, but it only happens when they are together, so they are scared if they are on their own, mind you i find the British are now very aggressive, amazes seeing that compared to when i were a child living in a 2up and down slum pit house with no indoor toilet or bathroom, but the neighbours knew how to enjoy themselves, somebody would get their concertina out and we would dance the night away, we had no money.

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      • #4
        Hi Anne Elizabeth



        Sorry to hear your plight , nothing worse than being back on the playground eh??



        When will these people ever grow up!! - dont speak to HER!! etc etc



        You enjoy the peace for now



        keep in touch



        Horsefans

        "Take off and nuke the site from orbit- it's the only way to be sure!"



        apologies if you are an "Aliens" fan



        Posh Noodle - NOT for the likes of YOU!!

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        • #5
          Hi AE.



          Sorry to hear you're having similar difficulties to mine. We haven't had the sort of comments about hoping we have a heart attack, but I can guarantee that our NFH, given half a chance, would do the same.



          Have a look at my thread under "Stupid Neighbours".



          Like all bullies, they thrive on getting a reaction out of you. Do not give them one, however motivated you may feel. It is a natural response but you must resist. Like my NFH, they will become more annoyed seeing that their tactics fail hence they won't bother.



          Also the other neighbours will begin to see where all the hassle is coming from. This is what happened with our NFH. They initially spouted off to the other neighbours about how bad we were but after seeing that we don't do anything to cause trouble, the other neighbours see that it is the NFH who is the protagonist. I think from reading your post that the other neighbours realize what your NFH is like. They'll just end up looking more and more stupid.



          The result? Our NFH is now totally isolated. More isolated than we thought actually as you'll see in the post I'll put up on my thread immediately after this.



          I don't know if moving is a practical proposition for you. In fact it maddens me when I see people having to move because of an NFH. But if you're planning on staying, then stay calm. You're not alone as you'll see here and rest assured the NFH will get their just desserts in due course. These sort of people just end up self destructing.
          Now, these creatures are bringers of death and misery. They will never eat, they will never sleep, and they will never stop.



          We are part of an ancient secret society. For three thousand years we have guarded the Cities and Towns. We are sworn at manhood to do any and all in our power to stop the NFH from ever being reborn into this world.




          So what's the plan?



          Rescue the damsel in distress, stop the bad guys, save the world.

          Comment


          • #6
            Dear A-E.



            How horrid for you. However, I note that there's been some good advice. I'd like to reiterate what Misty said,



            "Don't think they're laughing at you because they think you are inferior, they're laughing because they know they can never be as nice as you so they have to try and disguise the fact. Let's face it if they didn't care about what you thought they wouldn't go out of their way to annoy you. They feel intimidated by you."



            We too had a situation with 2 sad-act households ganging up. We were luckier than you in that the other neighbours would not hide their friendships with us. It didn't take too long for the 'hood to realise how nasty the nfh were, and many have given witness statements to the police about the nfh appalling behaviour. We still couldn't hack it tho', moved, now we're much happier. It seems to me like you have a choice of ignore them, fight, or flight.



            Hope you're taking the opportunity to get to know your neighbours now. You'll probably find the nfh households are v. unpopular. It seems selfish, but often decent folk hear this awful talk and don't want to be involved. I wouldn't let some 'orrible so & so stop me talking to whoever I liked, tho'.



            You enjoy their/YOUR holiday! All the Best. Keep us posted.

            G.

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