Silly Sayings

[tortoise]

I know we come from all over the country, so have you heard any really silly sayings that don't actually mean anything?

For example:

It wouldn't be a show without Punch! :D

Where do you think you are, your Grannies yacht? :bigeyes: How many Gran's do you know with a yacht?? :lol:

Who's she, the cat's mother?

I'll take my hand off your face!

He couldn't point to a car, let alone drive one!

I'm sure I will think of somemore later.

:thumbs:

[er 59]

hi tortoise
how about its better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all
tell that to someone with a broken heart :o

and "who let the cat out of the bag"meaning to tell someones secret :unsure:

just found out what it means people in the olden days used to put a cat in a bag instead of a pig when going to market so if someone let the cat out of the bag they gave away a secret
found that out on www.phrases.org.uk :)

[Domestic Goddess]

If someone's being greedy, we say "Chunky wants a bun"

When someone's mouth is puckered in annoyance we say "they've got a mouth like a cat's bum"

If someone's doing something slowly, I often say "I could have trained a chimpanzee to do it by now"

[tortoise]

More:

Running around like a headless chicken

There's no such word as can't

Every cloud has a silver lining

Cold hands, warm heart

You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink

You'd lose your head if it wasn't screwed on.

:thumbs:

[Bonkers Mad!!!]

If I asked what was for tea my mum always replied "2 jumps at the door and a bite at the latch"

my mates boy asked that question when he was about 4, she replied, "stewed f*rt and onion" to which her son whined, "but i don't like onion" :hihi:

[Christina1972]

My dear old Gran always said she wanted 'bread and pullit' for dinner, beacuase when they wasn't much food to go around they would pull the bread out to make i

[tact77]

When younger to an ugly person 'face like a bulldog chewing a wasp'

Snogging was 'tonsil tennis'

Useful as a chocolate teapot...

[JIMMY]

"Its black over bills mothers" ...... whos bill when hes at home then? :blink: = dark clouds are coming

“up the apple and pears” = the stairs

“its been that today hot I’ve been sweating like a pig on heat… like a whore in church” = you’ve been sweating today ;)

Oohh you not married “your living over brush” ….eh :blink:

Hes not nice him……”hes as rough as a bears ar*e” :lol:

“She’s got a face like a bulldog chewing a wasp” = shes not pretty. :D

“She got a face like a bag of spanners” = a lady with jowls :D

“it’s like rocking horse sh*t” = its very rare :blush:

“I been rushing about like a blue ar*e fly” = I am very busy

I have enough to do, I’ll stick a brush up my ar*e!”

“as tight as camels a*se in a sandstorm” = not generous

“a mouth like Ghandi’s flipflop” = my mouth is dry

:blink:

[Eeyore]

Oh I love these, some of them I have never heard of! :hihi:

One my parents used were "you're looking for a sore bottom " (no, I'm not!) :blush:

People had faces like a "bulldog licking p*** off a thistle"

Things were as useful as a chocolate fireguard ;)

2 cans short of a six pack (similar to HellBellys picnic and sandwiches) :P

[er 59]

:lol: :lol: @jimmy
my mum often used the brush one she would sayi will sweep the floor as well shall i
havent heard that one for years :thumbs:

[coppernob]

My Gran used to say bread and pullit, another one of hers was "laugh? It's enough to see a pudding crawl" and "Don't tell them that or there all want one"!

[phantos02]

Ha this is a great thread!! How about..

That'll put hairs on your chest - I don't want hairs on my chest!!!

Cheap at half the price - well it would be cheap if it was half the price wouldn't it???

Don't smile, your face might crack - to someone miserable looking

My Grandad used to have some classics, like If it takes a week to walk a fortnight, how many apples in a bunch of grapes? A pear.

I'm sure there are more I just can't think of 'em right now!

Mother in law uses Up at the crack of sparrow f*rt to mean getting up very early!

Why is it that the British say I couldn't care less wheras the Americans say I could care less. I think we win that one! :)

[Lady Penelope]

:lol: Shoot the moon....this is a brill thread :thumbs: Too tired to think just now...might come back tomorrow with some :lol:

LPxxx

[Eeyore]

Oooh my mam always said "shut yer cake hole" or "yer trap" what is that!!!! :lol:

[Christina1972]

'Well I'll be blowed' - meaning surprised, always confused me that one....blowed what, up, off?

"If that doesn't just take the biscuit" - meaning surprised

Christina

[JIMMY]

"got more faces than a townhall clock" - two faced
"trouble at mill" - trouble looming
"Its like trying strike a match on a bar of soap" - its impossible
"freeze the b***s of a brass monkey" - its cold
"bobs your uncle, fannys your aunt" - sorted, problem solved
"knocked your duck off" - upset you
"burning the candle at both ends" - not getting enough sleep
"turtles head touching the cloth" - needing the toilet :blush:
:blink:

[phantos02]

Originally posted by JIMMY@15th July 2005 - 12:45 PM
"turtles head touching the cloth"** - needing the toilet** :blush:
:blink:

122482


Ha ha Jimmy you are the best at this!!! We use 'touching cloth' in our house too. Actually we have quite a few other expressions for that which I probably shouldn't go into here!!! :D :D :D

I can't help it I just love toilet humour!

[sp54]

Talk the hind leg off a donkey :unsure:

My belly thinks my throats been cut :o

As sure as God made little apples :blink:

[AngelCake]

The only one I know that hasn't been said is 'a few candles short of a candelabra' - a bit thick ..

Angel

[JJ]

good thread!!! :D


as peter Kay would say,

'' I wouldn't touch him with a barge pole''

'' It's too cold to snow''........what's that about ?? :hihi:



JJ

[tact77]

Some more i have thought of

verbal diarrhea - talks too much

a wink is as good as a nod - not sure but my Dad says it alot

beer goggles - something you gain about 11.30 on a saturday night

does a bear sh*t in the woods

[louisej55]

Better to be an old mans darling
than a young mans fool (meaning older men are better boyfriend material) Ha!

You and who's army?

[tortoise]

Like a tit in a trance = rushing around

He looked like he had swallowed a bear and left the a*se hanging out = a man with a bushy beard

not for all the tea in china

the bees knees
dogs b*****ks etc

As useful as an ashtray on a motorbike

Up the wooden stairs to Bedfordshire=going to bed

Do you think I'm made of money?

My Nan always says to Little T "Give us a kiss for Christmas, under the mistletoe!" IT'S SUMMER!!!!

More later! :thumbs:

[Domestic Goddess]

To express surprise Mr DG says "Well spank my a*se and call me Charlie"

As a replacement for swearing I use "Great Googly Moogly"

To suggest that some one is nuts - "he's a can short of a sixpack"

For a thin person - "I've seen more meat on a sparrow"

Regarding an unfortunate looking person - "He fell out of the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down"

To a stupid person - "Go home, your village wants it's idiot back"

A "common" girl - "she's a graduate of the Kat Slater Charm School"

[tortoise]

Heard this today

I'll box your ears!!

:D

[Eskander]

An old friend from East Anglia used to say of some one who was not very bright:

"If all his brains were dynamite, there wouldn't be enough to blow his hat off"

[tact77]

Hi

As useful as a chocholate teapot - not very useful

Bobs your uncle- not sure about this one????