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sp54
12-05-05, 05:00 PM
I think that our lives are already mapped out for us. I also think some people are 'born lucky' or 'born unlucky'. I know we are in charge of the decisions we make in life, but don't we all know people who nothing EVER goes wrong for and for whom everything lands nicely in their laps [I certainly do] and others who seem to have more than their fair share of bad luck through no fault of their own.

Like one of my 3 children.........

My youngest son is just turned 21 and if something is going to go wrong, he will be there!

It all started years ago, and as he has grown older it has got worse. Three years ago he went on his first foreign holiday with friends. We worried about him of course, but we heard nothing so assumed all was well. In reality, he had spent all but the first couple of days in hospital, the victim of an attack by fellow English youths. I'll call them youths, but that is too nice a label for them. Sons friends had wanted to go on somewhere else after a night out, but son didn't and headed back to the apartment alone. Of course, he should not have done this, and was set upon and suffered a fractured skull. He didn't want us to be told as we were away ourselves, and he didn't want to worry us. :cry:
Only a few months later one winter night as he and his manager were closing up the shop they were working in then, they were attacked by 3 hooded thugs armed with knives. They were both forced to the floor, son with a knife held to his throat, while another one slashed his clothes with a knife, just to let him know they meant business. Son went back to work but the gang decided to further intimidate and repeatedly returned with knives to 'get them'. They were never caught, but my son took a year to get over it. For several months he would only sleep during the day when I was around, and he would sit up all night, terrified these thugs may have followed him home, and harm us all. His employers offered him counselling etc, but we all suffered that year, and he was still recovering from his holiday injuries!
Only a few months later he had his drink spiked at a private party. He could easily have died that night and was very ill and spent the night in hospital. His friends were great and helped all they could, but the ignorant ******* who did it was never caught.
Last year a car pulled out straight in front of my son. The driver admitted liability, but my son suffered neck injuries. This was all at the same time as going through a bad time at work, AND the N'sFH had moved in and began their evil ways. As we were friendly at first, they knew son had been through some bad times, so being the nice,kind decent people they were, they targetted him with their goading and taunting and harassment just as much as us.
At the beginning of this year he started a new job. He is doing really well there and we are so pleased for him. He loves it. His new employers are so pleased with him they finished his training early and 6 days ago he was given a brand new company car. 'Good' I thought, maybe his luck is changing. This morning he left for work at the same time as one of the parents left here having dropped off their child to me to look after. As I stood at the door seeing them off, the parent reversed straight into the front of sons 6 day old '05' reg car :bigeyes: :cry: Her car [quite old] has barely a scratch on it - sons- what do you expect? Completely wrecked at the front, and goodness onlyknows what his employers will say, though the parent admitted liability.[one good thing about having cctv I suppose - it was caught on that probably, haven't checked yet]. :thumbs:
So it goes on. My other 2 children don't seem to have the same ill luck as their brother, and it is never his fault - if it was I wouldn't be so sympathetic.
So, are some people born unlucky/lucky? I really think that may be the case. It certainly has been for son for the last 3 years.

sp54
18-05-05, 07:09 AM
Thanks,HN.
I'm sorry to hear your son is also having a bad patch. I think you're right, you know, I think good and bad times do go in 'cycles' for many of us. Our son is having a few bad years that have all been out of his control. Fingers crossed he has many good years to come and the cycle will soon be broken. As a parent, no matter how old your kids are, it really hurts to have to stand by and watch helplessly.
He is certainly due a run of good luck.
Thanks again, HN.

mazza
18-05-05, 08:05 AM
Hi sp54 :)

I am so sorry, I read this a few days ago and I was going to post a reply later on but I couldn't cos my PC blew up :lol: (yes, it was Fri the 13th..... :rolleyes: )

Man, I am so sorry to read about your son/family. I really must seem as though someone has it in for you, I know the feeling :sad: .

But I also believe that it's now your time to have a run of good fortune, so stay strong and positive...things will start to turn now, I feel and it's great that he has found a job that he enjoys too! :flowers: .

sp54
18-05-05, 08:45 AM
Thanks Mazza. Fingers crossed.

Sorry about your PC. How awful. I am now getting withdrawal symptoms if I don't use ours regularly. However did you cope???? :lol:

sp54
18-05-05, 05:06 PM
Oohhh,Moby. Sorry to hear that. I do believe we learn from our 'problems' as you say. I guess it feels worse somehow when it's your child, and you want to protect them.
When I think about it, I had a very rough patch years ago,when so many awful things went wrong in a short space of time and everyone said to me they don't know how I coped, but I think you just get on and get through it, and come out the other end having learnt something. I hope my son is 'learning' something throughout his run of bad luck :unsure:

sp54
18-05-05, 05:32 PM
No, you don't have a choice. If someone said to me oh, you are going to have a really bad patch, or one of your children will have a really bad patch, I think I'd have a complete nervous breakdown :bigeyes: Thank goodness you don't know what is around the corner, so you can keep telling yourself things will get better. Then one day, hopefully, you are right :blink: :unsure:

These things, as they say, are sent to try us.


It's not just our little family. My nephew was diagnosed with cancer a year ago [he's 34]. He has a lovely wife and 2 year old son. As if that was not enough to cope with, his wife's mother was diagnosed with breast cancer a few weeks later. The day her mother was due to start treatment, her father collapsed with a massive stroke. The poor girl is still beside herself with grief, and several other things have gone wrong for them in the last year. It seems so unfair. It never rains but it pours, is certainly true.

mazza
20-05-05, 08:25 AM
Hi sp :)

Can your nephew's cancer be treated? (and his MIL too) There's so much that can be done if they are able to catch and treat it early. :unsure:

Even so, it's a gruelling road and I'll certainly be thinking of him and his Mother in Law. Gosh and his father in law - is he recovering OK from the stroke? It's so cruel, isn't it? :sad:

sp54
20-05-05, 12:06 PM
Hi
My nephew is doing ok so far, but of course it affects everyone,doesn't it? His mother is my sister and she needs a lot of reassurance too.

His MIL is having very regular checks too, and fingers crossed for her. However, his FIL is now in a nursing home following his stroke.That he survived at all is amazing, but he is partially paralized and very rarely reconizes his own family, and can't speak. It's all very sad, he was a fine man.

My nephew and his wife are a delightful young couple and I really feel for them. They have had more than their fair share of bad luck for one year.