Were You Friends With Your Neighbour Before They Became A Neighbour From Hell?

[Matthew]

This is our latest poll attached, votes and comments are welcome.

Thanks. :)

[pmt]

My Parents gave our ex nfh ,a tumble drier we didn't need anymore,some furniture ,got their 2 girls some guinea pigs,gave the children an ice cream Mars bar each ,when one of the girls fell and hurt herself,The other ex nfh ( friends of above) My Mum bought her some baby clothes for her new born, they soon forgot all this and made our lives hell for 10yrs,

PMT

[Elliebes]

Initially yes I was friendly and so was he. He wanted to come in and help decorate my flat for me but I would rather have remained private. He offered again and I said I would let him know. Things seemed to go funny after this and he started with that fan. He told me he had been an antisocial neighbour in the past and been thrown out of places but didnt know why? (still obviously not learnt his lesson) and he told me the woman who had lived in the flat before me had complained about him. I was prepared to overlook these comments and give him the benefit of the doubt as we all make mistakes in life and can be given a second or third chance but then he started with his smells and music and all night TV playing so I complained then he started with the fan in the ceiling and has used that method ever since. The woman who lived here before me was a frail old lady of 75 and she would never have gone the distance of complaint as I have...this man is a bully and he thinks he can bully women in particular....well Im built like a Rhino and Im going to keep charging at him until he gets the hell out of my face....now I dont speak to him at all. I just blank him if he's outside.

I get on with most people and I have to keep reminding myself all the time that its this mans stuff and not mine. He is the one that makes problems for himself by thinking his flat is a detached house.

There are just some people out there who cannot resist fooking your life and get off on it...theyre not happy unless theyre in your life somewhere even as a source of irritation. Im a friendly gregarious person and he has ruined what could have been a good neighbourly relationship for himself with his childish spite and maliciousness. All because he's been told to shut the fook up well I aint going nowhere Im staying put.

[sp54]

We live in a semi and we are the only pair of houses in a small, quiet,
private access road. We were thrilled when a nice young couple moved in next door and went out of our way to help them. They invited us to their house warming party and things were fine for the first 3 months. Then I came home one day to find a man from the council assessing the private access road to see if it was suitable for more vehicles. He said to me '' your neighbours have told you they have applied for planning permission to convert their house into 3 flats haven't they''?

Errrrrmmmm, no they hadn't, they must have forgotten to mention that small thing to us :unsure::blink::angry:

We used our right to object to their plans for various reasons and the rest is history. They were not given planning permission, but went ahead anyway and there started years of abuse, harrassment, intimidation false accusations etc etc etc. Well, obviously we had to be punished for spoiling their plans in the only way most nfh pondlife know how :rant::sad::cry:

[Planet 24]

Have to say in my case my perp was scum from day one and as far as I know still is.

A friend who still lives in the area told me a few weeks ago the local police had to go round as the music was blaring out with another 'party'. Her retort to the police was 'spose those black cxxxs sent you round'!

Nice young lady!

[Isis]

Well in my case with my two NFH the answer is yes for one and sort of for the other one. I was actually "friends" with Cods, before all the trouble when I say friends perhaps aquaintance is the best way to describe it as I used to walk to the station with her as she worked in the local town and we left the same time. Until she had a really big row with another neighbour and then I was accued of being nosey and it all kicked off from there. Although the row with the neighbour was absolutely nothing to do with me in any shape or form.:angry:

As to the other ones, well every time I used to go into the garden the women would appear from her house and start talking to me, really did not have the time to stand there all day listening to her and her husband "run" people down who lived in the street, so although I was pleasant did not really want to get involved with them espically after the husband admited to me that he had opened our porch door and sorted through our post as he was sure that some post of him had been delivered to our house by mistake :blink: how it he could see whose post was whose from their lounge window absolutely beats me :bigeyes:

So after that espisode I tried to keep clear, very difficult and then the problems started.

[StoneHenge]

I met mine the day I moved in, but it descended into hell pretty soon after. I tried to do it the nice way. I even brought the daughter chocolates for being quiet one night. Sad really, because actually they didn't give a fig about us.

[suzenusude]

I have not had chance or time to read all the post on this thread, but let me say that I am still lamenting with regret, that I had anything to do with my NFH in the first place. It has been a huge lifetime mistake. I knew 'It' was a NFH from day one, but 13 years ago, there were no vegitation growing in the gardens for shielding and privacy, and I tried to be polite and friendly to try soften 'It' up (If you dont mind I refer to my NFH as an it although its female in species) Big mistake!!! I should of keped myself well to myself. I have put myself in a vunerable possition by being so sweet to her that first summer I moved in.

[Omega]

We weren't really good friends just friendly, lived in a 1930's semi - he was a friend of my nephew's wife. They seemed sort of nice when they moved in but it didn't take long before the music started being played at unacceptable levels in house and garden, at first they obliged by turning it down then after 6 months of me asking them to turn it down they got fed up started calling us over-sensitive just because we were in our 50's, then they turned nasty all went downhill from there, then whilst Mr O & I were on honeymoon he moved our fence, reshaped it to fit, and moved it further into our property to give them a bigger entrance into their front garden for his works big white van!!

He looked a typical thug and used drugs, had untaxed, uninsured cars - motorbikes - vans in their front and back gardens, two jet-ski's!!!! He also had a criminal record which we weren't told about until they were arrested for harassing us for 4.5 years!!! Not a nice person at all, but most surprising of all was that his partner was cabin crew for a famous Atlantic airline but she was so nasty out of uniform and used to say "we can do anything we want and it's nothing to do with you; we can play our music as loud as we want to" so typical NFH imo.

[Jewel_Peacock]

A hard one to answer for me really since our problems with the NFH started the day we moved in - our first night was spent with earplugs in as her teenage son was throwing a wild party and wondering if we'd made a terrible mistake by buying the house :/

[Crezz1]

Erm not really, would nod and say Hi, unfortunately you could tell when we did speak these were the sort of people that you would only nod and say hello too, I can remember our first conversation was, I got f**king kicked out of a C**ting Footie match last nite and spent the night in the F**king cells,

I rest my case.

[jane01]

yes i was friends with this person.i fell out with her cos i found out she was stealing from me , and shes been doing it ever since.

[Lady Godiva]

I sort of knew we were in trouble with my NFH as she had to move from her old home as her neighbours had fire-bombed it, as they were sick and tired of her!!!!!

[devonian r]

My NFH arrived with fame ! I was advised from day ONE to keep diaries etc, but after 15 years, nothings changed.

ASBO's are sought after prizes.

A 'double post' has been made by the same author, within 24 hours on this NFHiB thread (e.g. where the last poster has replied again with another message before any other member). This has been automatically merged with the author's previous post, for ease of reading.

Hi Lady Godiva, Had to check your profile as I haad heard my NFH was fire bombed too !
15 years down the line still have 'em

[jane01]

prnt. glad i read yours, they sound a lot like my nfh.i helped them too,wish id never laid eyes on them.

[Lady Godiva]

Hi Devonian,

I do that all the time on here! Since my NFH moved from here in April, I am waiting for someone to say 'I've had a mad, awful,nasty woman move in in April!' but I was told that she has been placed next door to someone who would 'sort it out' if she started on them!!!!
I probably would have tried the firebomb approach myself but I've not really brushed up on my firebomb making skills! :wacko:

[tansy101]

In my case we realised on day one when the NFH had a screaming match until 3am so we bought earplugs the next day. Then we went to our car and noticed that the NFH's car had been broken into so despite our broken night we thought we would be neighbourly and let them know. Big mistake, they answered the door and let off a stream of abuse assuming we were there to complain about the row they had had til the early hours. When we finally got them to understand what we had knocked for they immediately accused us of doing it and tried to push me down the stairs. Not my husband of course as he was a bit big but me at 5'1 so we hastily retreated and decided to give the loonys a wide berth. Cue almost 8 years of sheer hell in which we have not had one decent nights sleep except when we went on holiday, we have both ended up on medication due to the stress. We have had death threats, numerous pieces of property damaged, attempts to kick our front door in, repeatedly spat at, burning coals and cigarettes thrown, racist abuse, abuse because my husband and son are disabled the list goes on. Our HA who boast that their ASB policies are so good they teach other HA's how to do it were absolutely useless and to my mind condoned this behaviour by probably sabotaging the evidence we had on recordings, as the tapes mysteriously didn't work when we had it and they didn't get a warning letter telling them it was there due to an oversight but apparently worked fine when they were warned and behaved. Our hundreds of logs were submitted, scanned and unread as conversations with the 6 ASB officers we dealt with over the years have proved and throughout nothing was done, they just repeatedly had a chat and were promised that the behaviour would cease and within days it was back to normal. so after a few months of more logs and complaints they would have another chat and so on and on.

[Sky2]

I knocked on doors to introduce myself when I moved in. 2 doors down told me not to complain if I hear music as teenagers can't listen to music quietly. Next door lady came out of her house and started moon walking backwards marking out her territory (which wasn't hers according to my survey), they put their dog in my back garden each day so I saved up and had a big fence put up which they then burnt and denied, although you could see it was clearly black on their side. Other side started parking across my drive and playing loud music as soon as I moved in and they are the ones I refer to as the NFH. I've had nice neighbours in the past but I think then I was just incredibly lucky. Now I can see why people keep themselves to themselves.

[jaxs 49]

hi I joined the forum today but carnt seem to get in it keeps saying invalid password. im having murders with my neigbours, and just wanted peoples advice. thxs jaxs49

[Lady Godiva]

Hi Jax,

Not sure what the matter is with your password but I seem to remember that you have to click on a link through your email to validate your password. Not sure though!

Welcome anyway!

[Matthew]

hi I joined the forum today but carnt seem to get in it keeps saying invalid password. im having murders with my neigbours, and just wanted peoples advice. thxs jaxs49

Hi jaxs 49; welcome to NFHiB. You were logged in when you posted that so it looks like your password is fine.

You can reset this from the following link though: http://www.nfh.org.uk/forums/login.php?do=lostpw

[unknown_person]

When I first moved in to my home, our attached neighbour used to play loud music. He seemed a pretty decent guy, we notified him of any work we had planned on our home and stuck to the times we said to him. He seemed really pleased we respected him, so one time I mentioned the noise and he was like 'You hear it?' to which I joked about the whole street hearing it. From that point we joked about it and it stopped, however he would get drunk and start shouting in his home. It was fairly easy at first, as I would have a quiet word and he often listened. He invited us over many times, we had a laugh and it wasn't as annoying. His girl friend moved back in with their daughter and my boy become close friends with them, his girl friend seemed to think a lot of our daughter also.

However, After they came round to our house one time things quickly went down hill. The girl friend would always stir at us and shoot looks, if we had a take-away not long after they would. We had things do to our home, they did. It was like keeping up with the jones's and I thought this was actually dead funny at first. They had a really loud party one night and I went over, spoke to them and the guy invited me in. (I stayed a bit) while chatting to him about the noise, he was fine about it and did try to keep it down. As I left his girl friend turned to him and said 'Are you going to mention to him the noise he f***ing makes'.

Boom it all went down hill, he assulted me not after that leaving me with a badly bruised eye and temporary damage to my vision.

After that we stopped communicating with them, he would send me texts and invite me over like it was normal behaviour. (I didn't respond) we'd see them and we avoided them. The problem got much bigger, though if we cut away from it wasn't too bad. He even had the nerve to call the police and told them I was harassing him and his girl friend. Police came out, threatened to arrest me. I tried explaining the problems, wasn't interested. That's where it ended, he moved out near christmas and now they rent the house to a women who does nothing but bang. very annoying...

[ubernig]

I'm new to this forum and have been lurking for a while but the poll caught my eye. Our NFH started out as a pleasant family and we spent many a summer night with a few beers over the garden wall. From the moment we bought the house we had a noise issue, nothing as chronic as some here have mentioned but sufficient to derail our quality of life. We kept the peace for the sake of being neighbourly.

When their dog died it was replaced with another of the same breed and was personable and very quiet. A few months later a snappy Jack Russell arrived which barked incessantly from the outset, teaching bad habits to the other. Maybe a dozen times I brought it up, being sure to keep it on a pleasant level but each time was just a little more uncomfortable than the last. By 2009 I was left with a choice of anti-barking device or court action. I chose the former hoping to keep things neighbourly. Big mistake, that resulted in threats and promises of criminal damage. Needless to say it went downhill from there.

Only a week ago my wife was attacked by their dogs in our garden. Thankfully she was physically unhurt (but now won't go into our garden). They are telling stories that the dogs just sniffed my wife. They don't know yet that I have it videoed..... I can sniff a DDA charge on its way. The noise monitoring equipment was a failure, that was removed today - from the moment it went in the dogs were silent, almost like they were tipped off by one of their thuggish neighbour-friends. And so the game continues (not that I think it is a fun game, quite the opposite).

There is one thread common to all these NFH stories. Selfishness. Thankfully my failed suicide brought home just who is right and who is wrong. Bullying must never be tolerated - EVER. If allowed to succeed even once, fighting it is an uphill battle. Be true to yourself, be honest, be polite, be persistent with the authorities. There is nothing wrong in aspiring to a modest quality of life - something that the brainless thugs seek to destroy. In the end, the only power they have over us is what we give them.

Best wishes to all who suffer from NFH and may you attain the quality of life you deserve. Power to your elbow. Or even your crossbow..... Metaphorically, of course ;o)